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Category Archives: Well, isn’t that Haikute

Spoiler-free Haiku Review of Super 8

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Quirky kids are cute/

The ’70s were so mint/

Cloverfield again?

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Haiku Reviews: Sex and the City 2

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This is a new feature I’m doing… and, yes, I really did just watch this movie for the first time.

 

 

Sex and the City/

Without sex- or the city/

Who approved this shit?!

The MTV Movie Awards- a Recap in Haiku Form

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Brilliant idea!

When your new movie sucks balls,

Promote an old one.

 

 

Scientologists

Xenu gives them some sweet moves-

Price? Their sanity.

 

‘Twilight’ won it all.

MTV loves teenage girls-

its only viewer.

 

This kiss was awkward.

Vanessa- was it Zac’s beard,

or that you’re his beard?

 

Snoop is desperate.

He’s on a white girl’s pop track-

and no pot lyrics!

 

Oh, hi, Jesse James!

MTV made up a prize-

just because you suck.

 

Yay- Leslie Chow won!

Toot-a-loo, mother fuckers!

Now- where is his purse?

 

Draco Malfoy won,

So Marky Mark heckled him.

Am I on acid?

 

Forget Lucius,

Draco Malfoy’s true bully?

Mid-air Will Ferrell.

 

 

Hey, I’m bionic!

My throne is wrapped in duct tape,

but I’m still fierce- right?

 

 ‘Twilight’ ends the night.

The cast shouts “fuck” a lot.

And I did as well.